Contemporary Gospirational Artist, Song Writer, Insightful Blogger and Keynote Speaker
Adam was the only man God found a wife for and after the fall, he blamed God, saying, ‘the woman you gave me…’ According to my husband, that was the last time God took on such a project. His current modus operandi is ‘He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord’. Dear Single Man who plans to get married someday, be aware – Finding a wife is completely your responsibility!
A mentor of mine teaches about the timelines of life with 0-25 being the morning, where you get your education, make friends, develop values, build character…. 26-50 being the afternoon where you earn money, marry one of your friends, and invest for the future. 51-75 is the evening which is often marked by leaving a legacy for the younger generations, your kids marrying, grandparenthood, and so on.
I usually say this – if you plan to get married at all, do it in your early afternoon, especially if you intend to have children. Do the math yourself. If you wait till late afternoon you’ll be paying university tuition with your pension. You don’t have to own an empire or be the richest man in Babylon before you get married. You can start from an okay position and grow from there with your wife.
Eves (wives) are not in hiding. They can be found everywhere – in school, at work, in the mall, at social gatherings, and so on. If you see a ‘prospect’ that interests you, be bold enough to introduce yourself to her and start a conversation. See how that goes and grow the relationship from there if you’re pleased. I guess you’re asking. ‘How do I find a good wife, a helper that is suitable for me?’
First and foremost – Man, know thyself! Understand your purpose. Do a serious self-evaluation and determine your values, beliefs, likes, dislikes, passion, ambitions, desires, and dreams; then clearly come up with your definition of a ‘good wife’ who complements you. It needs to be your definition because you are the one who will marry and spend the rest of your life with the one you find.
Have an adventurous mindset and embark on the journey to find your wife – one that fits your definition to a great extent. Be determined to do a thorough job. You really don’t want to manage a spouse. Watch and pray. Watch for values, character, and other things you defined. Ask questions and take note of the answers. The things you can’t live without must be present and the things you can’t live with must be absent. Do your research. Study good books on marriage and find a good mentor. Gather all the facts. Engage your brain – your intelligence & analytical reasoning skills. Pray for discernment and opportunities to find out more about your prospect, and trust God to direct your path.
Finally, bring your research to a close by making a decision. Is she the one? If that answer is YES, then you can proceed to the proposal.